Finding Your Authority

According to dictionary.com, authority is the right to control, command, or determine.  What does that mean for us in our individual lives?  What does it mean to have personal authority?  It has to do with knowing where we stand and recognizing what principles and beliefs we base our judgments on.  It’s an energy that allows us to make decisions, choose a path, and find our way.  When we are faced with conflicting messages about what to do, where do we find our sense of direction?  On whom do we rely for guidance?  On what do we ground ourselves?  All these questions come into play when we endeavour to find an inner sense of authority.

There are as many answers to these questions as there are people who reflect on them.  These days seem especially fraught for many people and the supports we are accustomed to relying on seem shaky or even inaccessible.  The experience can leave one feeling exhausted, depressed, aimless, or overwhelmed.  And yet resignation or collapse are not viable solutions.

So, what do we do?  I laugh at myself when, once again, I find myself believing that the answer to this problem (or any problem) is to get a dog.  Rarely is this sound advice on a literal level.  But what about the symbolic level?  Through the ages, dogs have been companions to their human counterparts.  They serve as friends, confidants, protectors, and guides.  They provide loyalty, compassion, unconditional love.  They represent a bridge between the material world and the spiritual world. 

I find that when someone is floundering, one or more of these psychological traits is undeveloped or diminished.  At times we lose our sense of direction, feel unprotected, rejected, or abandoned.  This is often felt as an external situation.  It is just as likely to be an inner reality. 

We lose touch with ourselves.  We judge or berate ourselves.  We relinquish our power.  It’s impossible for dogs to disconnect from their instincts or ignore their feelings or override their sense of direction.  I believe that the goal of any therapeutic process is to strengthen those inner qualities so that when life outside is painful, there is an inner source that can point us in a direction that is right for us at that moment.   

As a dog lover, I find meaning in the symbolism of dogs.  But these qualities can be experienced just as well in many other figures.  A lifelong friend, a nurse or doctor, an image of the good mother, a helpful forest animal, a stranger who walks us home – all these images hold the potential to provide guidance, love, healing.   A good therapy or analysis helps one find these energies within themselves and learn to trust them.   

There’s a fairytale that comes to mind entitled Vasalissa.  In this story, a little girl is given a doll blessed by her dying mother and told to hold onto it and feed it everyday.  By doing this, it will guide her safely through the inevitable snares of life.  The little girl follows her mother’s direction and avoids entrapment in the cruelty of her step-family as well as death at the hands of the Baba Yaga who resides deep within the forest.  One way to see the doll is as a symbol of the girl’s connection to her good mother energy.  That energy which is always looking out for her - encouraging and trusting her. We could also say it is her intuition – her sense of knowing and finding her way through the dark, tangled experiences of life. 

The story encapsulates the journey of finding one’s vitality by connecting with one’s deepest sense of knowing and life force.  When a person is attuned to these forces, a felt sense of personal authority follows naturally.  We are grounded in our own deep sense of what is necessary and valuable.  From this place, we can move and navigate.